Big news!
This is the absolute longest I have ever gone without posting on my blog. I don't even know where to start to try to catch up so I am going to write the short version of a long few weeks.

I'm pregnant. Enough said, right? I actually found out right before I went to Dallas with Pam but I haven't felt very good so I couldn't even post about it. It was a total and complete surprise to me and of course, to Mike. We had made the decision to move forward with adopting to expand our family and we were going to go full force into the process when we got back from Hawaii. I had already had several agencies send me an information packet and we were getting our ducks in a row for this new chapter. It all started when I was feeling really tired and just not myself. I have had two other times in my life when I felt like this and there was no mistaking it. I couldn't sleep the night before I left for Dallas so I got up at 1:30 am and took a pregnancy. My thoughts were confirmed. The lines read YES! I was very happy about it but I had to go in and wake Mike up from a dead sleep and tell him. After a little shock and a little surprise...we were elated. After all...it was about 1:45 in the morning! I made an appointment for the next Monday and I had a sonogram. Sure enough...the the little thing was. Heart beat and all. What a miracle it is to see you baby's heartbeat for the first time. I was instantly in love. When we went into the sonogram room Landry immediately said BABY! I have no idea why because there wasn't picture or any indicator of a baby in there. It really took us all by surprise. I pray for a happy, healthy baby and for a safe pregnancy. So far, I have been sick and nauseated. I am not surprised but I still hold out hope that I will get over it quicker than the last two pregnancies.
Baby Mader 3 will make it's debut in February. I cannot wait to meet you peanut!

The

The Big D!
My friend Pam and I went to market in Dallas and had a fantastic time. We always travel well together and know the process well. We went straight to the World Trade Center and shopped for 6 hours. We stayed at The Stoneleigh and were treated to one of the most wonderful experiences I have ever had. That says a lot because I travel so much and it takes something special to impress me. When we got there we were greeted by the concierge, Anthony. He was inviting, funny and very helpful. He even helped us with our bags and gave us the history of the historical building and the renovation process. He made us reservations for dinner. When we got to our room we were very happy with our accommodations, especially considering we got the deal of a life time. The rate was $103 for a 4.5 star hotel. The price on the back of the door was $695. Holla! We got ready and went downstairs. We opted to have the hotel's car take us so we wouldn't have to drive. It was then that we met Cliff. They have a really wonderful Mercedes that will take you where ever you want to go and Cliff is the nicest chauffeur you could ever meet. He was so nice and charming and he made us both feel very special. He was 70+ and did his job to perfection. He dropped us off at a restaurant called Bella and let me tell you, that was some prime people watching! We saw just about all you could imagine seeing there. It was a swanky, upscale establishment but there was some rich trash there. Seriously, the clothes...or lack thereof...were jaw dropping. I am certainly not a prude but it was shocking even for me. The food was great and the atmosphere was really fun. We had a great time there. We called Cliff back and he was back in a flash to pick us up. After he made a store run for me(I know, I'm not high maintenance at all!) he dropped us back off at the hotel and we sat there in a beautiful lobby/bar and talked for a little while longer. It had a great feel to it and it was impeccably done.
I love great ambiance and attention to detail!!
The next day we went back to market and were there for 12 hours. 12 hours I tell you! I was absolutely beat! We went back to the hotel to be greeted by Anthony once again and he made a few dinner suggestions. We went back up to the room and we got dressed and headed back out again. I asked him about the famous Penthouse Suite and he offered to give us a tour of it. The view from the terrace was nothing short of spectacular. We got the full tour and history of it and it was so interesting. We got to see where the secret doors and passage ways were and the panic room. It was one of my favorite parts of the whole trip. After the tour, Cliff took us to this really neat restaurant called Sambucca. It had live music and the most amazing menu. We were joined by a friend of mine who is also in the lighting business and we got a table full of appetizers and side dishes. We were stuffed by the time we rolled out of there.
We saw and bought so many wonderful things this trip. We left Saturday afternoon and rolled in that evening. I was so glad to be able to get away with one of my best friends and relax. Of course, Landry was in great hands with the Barnharts. They took her to the Tomato Festival in Crystal Springs and even had her in the children's parade. I sent her with a red shirt and a green bow so she could be the MADER QUEEN. I was going to make her a sash but I ran out of time. Maybe next year.
Anyway, it was a great trip and it was very fruitful. I missed my girl...and guy something fierce but the trip was worth the effort.

Money Money Money!
I just looked at the Department of Treasury notice that came out in the paper on Sunday and Mike and I both have money due to us!! What an unexpected treat :). Between the both of us we had over $700 dollars to absolutely blow!!! We are going to really splurge when we go to Hawaii now. That will get us an extra excursion and maybe a nice dinner to boot. I love found money!!

Father's Day!
Mike was going over his day today and he said and meant that it just couldn't be any better. His list included:
1. Being able to sleep in till 9:30---his sweet wife had Landry in the other room on the other side of the house.
2. Going to church with his family. He took Landry to the alter and we both laughed at her when she tried to get his bread after she had already taken her own. She needed a double dose of the Lord today!
3. Pizza for lunch and Landry was so good and ate like a champ. :)
4. She took a great nap and let Mommy and Daddy get some things done.
5. We were invited to some neighborhood friends house and watched the US Open and ate a great dinner. They had leftovers from a family reunion yesterday so we ate like kings and queens...and no dishes!!!
6. He got a remote control helicopter to go along with his REAL helicopter ride when we go to Hawaii in July, a fishing rod and reel, and a his and hers matching golf glove. Not mine silly! Landry and Daddy have matching golf gloves. It is the cutest darn thing you have ever seen. The jury is still out on what hand is going to be dominant. Mommy is a lefty and Daddy is a righty.
6. Mommy gave Landry and Bella a bath...not at the same time, BTW.
7. Daddy and Landry relaxing with a cup of warm milk catching a little Dora before night night time.
8. The absolute TOPS of the day was when Landry was walking to her room and she grabbed his hand and then reached for mine and said 'hand, hand'. She wanted to walk with both of us and didn't want to go any farther until she had created a Landry sandwich. We just looked at each other. She steals the moment...so many times in a day. She walked between the of both of us to her bed happy as a clam. She got to her bed, reached up for her Daddy and he picked her up. She gave us our hugs and he laid her down. She clasped her hands together and we said our prayers and she said 'Night night'. We put her blanket on her and gave her her baby, we both looked down on her and told her we loved her. We told her night night and walked out....proud as two parents could ever be. In the grand scheme of things, does it get any better than a day like this?
Mike, I hope you had a great Father's Day. She is the epitome of a Daddy's Girl and I hope you know how much we love not just today but all year.

Prayers
I had one of the funniest things to ever happen to me today. I have been working with Landry on saying her prayers and when she figured out that we say them before meals and before nap and bed time, she has not since hesitated to remind me. She gets in her bed and clasps her hands together and says 'Prayers' and waits for me or her daddy to say them. She usually instigates it now and I can't tell you how proud I am to see her put those sweet little hands together.
Today, we went shopping at Academy Sports and I was standing there looking at some fishing rods and there were three managers nearby looking at a display. I asked them their opinion on which one I should get and was in the middle of a conversation when Landry grabbed my hands that were on the cart and pushed them together and looked me right in the eyes and said 'prayers'. Her eyebrows were cocked up and she looked like she meant business. I stopped my conversation with the managers and said 'Do you want Mama to say a prayer?' all the while chuckling to myself. Not only did she repeat herself, she looked at the managers and gave them the 'brow'. One by one, they all clasped their hands and bowed their heads. I am not kidding you!! This really happened and I am laughing out loud as I type this. I said 'Okay...God Bless ALLLL the people in Academy Sports. Amen!' Landry said 'Amen' and went on about her business. I told the managers that they didn't know they were going to go to church, did they?! I couldn't help but laugh and be so proud of my baby girl. She is really something. She was so funny yet also brought a message to these three men that even I could not do. They all had a good laugh about it but were so impressed with her that they just couldn't stop smiling and commenting on her.
When I told my Daddy about it today, he was so proud of her and THAT really makes this mama beam with joy. Landry, YOU are answer to so many of my prayers and I know that God lives because he truly lives in you, my child.

Reunion Recap
Where do I start?! I was so exhausted from all of the details of the reunion that some parts of it seem like a blur. Rhonda and Eric flew in on Thursday and we went straight to my Aunt Elaine's house. It was nice spending the evening with them and visiting. Landry always gets plenty of attention there and she feels right at home. On Friday, we decided to stay at the hotel where the Meet and Greet was being held so all we had to do was ride the elevator home. I really enjoyed seeing all of my old friends and was especially happy to see that everyone looked so happy and healthy. I wish more people had come but as much as I hate to say it, it was truly their loss. We had so much fun dancing and talking with everyone. We had a great turnout and Mike and I shut the place down!

My cousin, Mindy was sweet enough to watch Landry for the two evenings of my festivities and boy did she get spoiled ROTTEN! I knew that she was in great hands but never did I dream that she would be so loved and so happy there. She really took to her and her husband Jimmy and just made herself right at home. She waved bye-bye to me without batting an eye both nights I left her there. I was able to go and have a great time without any worries knowing that she was her care. Thank you, Mindy! We love you!

We picked Landry up for the family picnic and went to a park in Mobile. It was very nice but HOT...HOTTER than HOT...HOT HOT HOT!!!! We left there and went to my cousin Shawn's and enjoyed seeing his family and meeting his children for the first time. It was a short but nice visit. I went back to the hotel and started working on the final details of the video again.
I spent countless hours putting together over 230 images from our high school days to music that really put us back in the day! I asked people from our class to email me pictures of old and current pictures and several people sent in quite a few hilarious flashbacks. I laughed so hard looking at all of those pictures...especially all of my hair...I mean ALL of my hair. It was large and in charge. What the heck was I thinking?! When it came time to watch the video, we all sat there and watched the 17 minute trip down memory lane and we all laughed and oohhed and awwwed together as a group. I was pretty proud of it and everyone seemed to really enjoy it. We had a great venue for the actual reunion and I did most of the decorations for it. I also did the awards and MC'd that part of the night. It was a long night for me but well worth the effort. The funny thing is I never had time to take any pictures. Imagine that! Me without a camera! I just couldn't do it all so I had to let that part go. All in all it was a success and I really enjoyed myself. Landry and I got to spend the last night of Rhonda and Eric's visit in Biloxi with them. I couldn't have asked for a better visit. I hate that they couldn't bring the kids but it was really nice to see just her and Eric enjoying themselves for a change. She works so hard being a great mom that I really appreciated seeing her as my sister and a wife again. On my way back, I went by Julie's new house and saw one of the prettiest pieces of land I have ever seen. It is a little slice of heaven right there in Magee, MS! I am so happy for them. They have worked so hard to have this beautiful home and it's paid for!! I won't know feeling that for a while...what an accomplishment!
All in all, it was an unbelievable weekend. I was able to see friends...old and new and family that I haven't seen in a while. Life is nothing without God, Family and friends. Nothing that you have or wish for are more important than these. I am blessed with an abundance of all three.

20th Reunion
I know I was a slacker this past week but I was the busiest I have been in a long time. I was trying to get a project completed for the museum, get a video completed, awards purchased and pack us both for all of the weekend festivities. I will do a run down of the weekend tomorrow. I am just too beat to get it all in but I will tell you that it was an incredible weekend and I think that my contributions to the reunion went very well. The best part of all of it was that I got to see my sister, Rhonda. It wouldn't have been the same if she hadn't come so I am very thankful that she and Eric could be there. Here are a few sneak peaks....

SCARED!
Tonight I got the biggest scare! Landry was in the tub and she stood up and slipped. She started crying immediately and I knew something was really wrong. That girl is tough as nails and she brushed off some of the hardest spills I have ever seen without so much as a whimper. This time not so much. When I looked down the first thing I saw was blood coming from her mouth. I thought 'O My God..she's knocked a tooth out!' It took me a little while to make sure she hadn't jarred it loose but I think she ended up biting her lip more than anything. She was calmed down with in 3 or 4 minutes. I wish it only took me that long! I was a wreck after seeing blood pour from her little mouth. She didn't even know it was there. Don't you wish we were all that resilient?! I feel for any fella that tries to mess with her. I take odds on her any day.
This morning she got up to the altar and I stood her up right in front of me. I told her it was time to pray so she would fold her hands and she immediately did. She stood there so patiently. I noticed several people in the pews admiring her big girl skills and it made me so proud of her. Yesterday we had to take her to the doctor because she was getting hoarse. I was worried about her spiking a little fever too so we took her on in. It was mainly a teething thing. She tested negative for strep to that relieved us. We went to the Farmer's Market and got some veggies for dinner and came on home. It was so beautiful outside but I opted not to take her to the pool just in case. She is quite the fish so I want to get her out there as often as possible this summer. I can tell her to swim when she is in the bath tub and she'll turn on her stomach and say 'kickin kickin kickin! all the while thrashing those legs around like a true fish. She'll turn over on her back and try to float when I ask her if she wants to float. It is so funny. She fears nothing!
This week is going to be an extraordinarily busy week for me. I am heading to Mobile for my 20th high school reunion! I cannot believe it. How did all of the time pass? It will be a lot of fun catching up with old friends and seeing their families. My sister and her husband will be flying in too so I get to visit with her for several days...can't wait!
I have a few videos of Landry that I am dying to share with. I will upload them in the next few days.

Singing in the Rain...
Don't you love those extraordinary opportunities that life throws your way sometimes? For me it was such a sweet moment between me and the Bug today. I was sitting in the floor of my bedroom folding this mountain of laundry and all of the sudden I heard the back door fly open and Landry was jail breaking on me! Mike accidentally left it unlocked when he walked Bella this morning and she immediately found her way to the unmanned door. It was raining like crazy outside and all I saw was her little hand go out and reach for the rain drops. There is an area that pours out some water over the gutter and causes this sheet of rain to come down. Landry saw it and shrieked ' Shower! Shower! Shower!' I told her that WAS a shower but to come back to me. She wanted to get in it so badly...I could feel it in her bones! After less than a minute of thinking about it I finally just said go ahead and jump on in. She didn't waste any time getting under that waterfall. It was cool yet she still eased her way underneath the steady stream of water. I ran and got my camera and stood there while she just explored the situation and enjoyed her outside shower. She looked at me and said "Mommy...shower?" I told her to hold on hoping that she would get bored and want to get out of it before I had to go in. Landry was having none of it. She came over and picked up the bottom of my shirt and said 'OFF! OFF! OFF!' I guess since she knows that we don't usually have shirts on in the shower she thought that I needed to get prepared to get in! I told her that I had to keep mine on but I put my camera down, picked her up and we proceeded to have one of the best times I have ever had with her. She LOVED being in the outside shower with her mama and I really think she knew this was something kind of special. We danced around in the rain and I literally got soaking wet. It poured on us and I can't imagine not having taken advantage of that one precious moment with her. I am so thankful I did. It makes me appreciate the little things I share with her each and every day. If I had to miss a moment like that to make an extra buck, I would hate it. I know that most people these days don't have the luxury to make that choice but I thank God(and Mike) every day that I do. Singing in the rain today with my daughter has got to be on my Top 5 all time favorite things I have ever done. It just goes to show you that some of the most valuable things in life are absolutely free. We were....siiiiinging in the raaaain....just siiiiiinging in the raaaaain! What a glorious feeling...I'm so haaaappy again!

Do some thing out of the ordinary today...you'll be so glad you did.

Grandaddy and Grandma
I can't even begin to tell you how happy I was to see my Daddy and my stepmother during our trip to Florida. I don't know how it could be much better than spending time with Kelley, my sweet family and my Daddy all in one week! It was a blue ribbon week for me! When Mike came in last Monday we spent some time on the beach and in the pool with Landry. She is such an easily adaptable child. She just goes with the flow and nothing seems to faze her. I love that about her and I hope that is one characteristic that she holds on to. It will serve her well in so many ways.
When we were at my Daddy's, I noticed all of his medals framed and on the wall. I had never seen them before like that and I asked him what they all meant. While he was explaining them to me I began to get a little emotional. I didn't expect it to come on like that but it did. I stood there in awe as he to explained all of them(and there were many) and I felt myself well up with pride for a man that has already been my hero my whole life. The one medal that was especially important to me was the one he received for the work he did in at Tan Mai Orphanage in Vietnam. It kind of took my breath away to think of all the things that our soldiers do and have done to give us all this life we live. There are so many components to our military, war and freedom. Those that don't have a history with the military could not possibly understand what the cost of FREEDOM really is. I know this sounds like a Memorial Day post and maybe it is a belated one but seeing those ribbons and metal all strategically placed in a case made me think a little longer and little harder about how and and why I am here. My story is a fairy tale and I am one lucky princess.

My Beauty
I know I may be just a little biased but I think my girl is an absolute beauty. Yesterday when she and her Daddy drove up to the condo I just couldn't keep my hands off of her. She was such a trooper on the plane...even though Daddy said she was very rambunctious :)...she slept the whole way to Jacksonville and was in a great mood. She is cutting some molars and you can tell it is affecting her normally sweet attitude. She has shown a little of her grumpy side lately but all in all they both did very well while Mama was away. When we woke up the next morning, Mike slept in late. The condo had the most incredible light so I got my camera out and ended up getting up some of my favorite shots of her. She is my beauty...inside and out. How blessed is this family to have so much love? Thank you, Jesus, for all of the beauty you give to me....in so many ways and with such abundance. When will I ever be worthy?

O-MY!!!
How can I even begin to tell you how much fun I had with the girls?! It was even better than I had hoped or planned. Since I didn't know everyone and the ones I knew I didn't know well, I wasn't sure if it was all going to work. Why..Why..Why do I question anything that God has a hand in? We had a BLAST! We stayed in an amazing condo in Jacksonville Beach (thanks GREG S.) and even though the weather was less than desirable, we absolutely had a great time. We started out at the condo on Friday night and a friend of mine and Kelley's and his girlfriend came over and we ate, drank and got merry! We went a few blocks down the road and went out dancing and ended up at the Waffle House....yes, it was THAT good. We goofed around on Saturday and waited for the rest of the crew to come in and we got ready for our big dinner. We gave Kelley her present and she loved it. I created a 75 page book for her from emails, notes and pictures that everyone gathered for her. It had some pretty amazing notes and letters to her. It made me so proud to have a friend that happens to be MY best friend that everyone else thinks so much of. It turned out really to be a very special gift and one I know that she will cherish forever. We hung out at a really nice beach club when the sun decided to come out and watched the sun set at the most perfect place. We ate great food, had fabulous conversations and celebrated one of the most wonderful women I know. I look back at all of the time we spent together and it was truly a beautiful celebration. She has been such a wonderful friend to me and one I know that I can count on for life. Happy Birthday! I love you, Kelley B!

Jacksonville Beach!
Yesterday I flew into Florida for a fabulous girls/family beach trip. I put together a trip celebrating Kelley B's 40th birthday with her 'lifers'. I am so excited! They are actually going to be here any minute and I have a few little surprises for the birthday girl. Unfortunately, the rain is here but we will all have a great time any way. When they leave on Monday, Mike will fly in with Landry...oh, my!...and will meet me here at the condo and we will start our family vacation. After a few days, we will drive to my Daddy's and visit them for a few days. I will blog about the details soon....

On the Landry front....my, my she is growing up too fast! I get a kick out of the things she gets excited about. Her latest obsession? Da...daa...da...daa DORA! She hands me the remote and says 'Dora Dora Dora Dora Dora!' so she gets Dora. Nothing else even gets her attention but she loves Backpack, Map and Dora Dora Dora Dora. This is going to be fun!!

Big Girl
Today I picked up a Britax car seat from a friend of mine whose son had outgrown it. It was almost brand new and is almost exactly like the one I have in my car. I wanted another one for Mike's car but they are pretty pricey so we've just never got around to it. I also took the plunge and FINALLY turned her car seat around. I know. I know. She could have turned around at a year old but I saw this video that freaked me out so I just couldn't do it yet. We had already turned Mike's around but I was avoiding it completely. I guess part of it was the milestone that it represented. I am not ready for her to get too big too soon! She can stay little for as long as she wants to. The best part of getting the seat was that I got to spend time with my sweet friend Jennifer. Her son Parker was quite the host to little Landry and they played like they had known each other forever. Wouldn't it be nice to just see someone for who they are that day and not have a judgement or a thought about them other than 'Hey! Let's just be friends and have a good time!' I guess that exists somewhere in the perfect world that exists on the 'other side' for us big people. For now, I guess we'll just have to see it in the actions of children. Parker is an only child and really enjoyed having a playmate around....even if she was less than half his age. It was like Christmas for us because they gave us a few things that he doesn't play with any more. He was so sweet and had no problem giving up his old toys to her. When we were leaving, the two of them were blowing kisses to each other and he came over and planted one right on her mouth! (Watch out Charlie!!) She just loved all his attention. I hope they can get together and play again soon. Thank you Jennifer and Parker for all of the goodies!!

There is also some big news forth coming so be on the look out!

Mother's Day 2009
I have a different perspective on this holiday and it's all because of Him and a little girl named Landry. For the past several years...7 to be exact...I have had a really bad attitude about it. Last year was pretty good but still stung me pretty hard when it came to Sophie. This year was different. I got to enjoy the fruit of being a mother in a totally different way and I also found some forgiveness that I didn't know I needed to give. It is a bittersweet holiday for me. No mother of my own and no Sophie...how does two bads get trumped by a good? Well it does and it did this year. It's even easier if you have a Landry like my Landry. She makes lots of pains go away and lots of heart breaks healed. How does seven years of heartache just go away all of the sudden. Even I don't know but it just did and that is all I care about. I credit her for so much of my happiness but the truth of it is that God has allowed me to have her, my husband and my family so He gets the credit today. He made me a mother...not her and not Mike. God did so ---'GOD, I'm giving you hugs, kudos and a huge high five today'. Is that appropriate? I don't know but if HE were here and I had the chance to give props for today I would hug Him and give Him a high five for this glorious life I live. I think He would want me to keep it real so that's what I would do.
Today, I got to sleep in...til 9am! Woo hoo! Mike took Landry to the other side of the house and I enjoyed a rare morning sleeping in until I got up. We got ready for church and afterward we went by Sophie's grave and to my sweet surprise there was a beautiful bouquet of fresh flowers in her vase and a new wind chime hanging. They were from Landry(via her Daddy) and thanks to her babysitter Ashton, aka 'Sha Sha', my first piece of art. I loved it! Then, in an attempt to keep the Bug happy, we went to Pizza Inn for lunch. It was a success because she loves the salad bar and the occasional bite of pizza. Isn't it funny how those fancy lunches and dinners are just not that important anymore. If she isn't going to be happy then I simply won't even consider it. I guess I really AM a mama! She ate like a champ and then it was home and off to nap time. The whole Mader family took a nice long nap and Mike even got up with her when she got up. (I could get used to this!) He got her pool ready and she went swimming for the first time this year and she LOVED it! She kept calling it a 'bath' so we tried to get her to use the word 'pool' and she finally obliged. She slid down the 'siiide' and played with her 'toiz'! She also has been letting me put her on her back in the tub so she can float while I hold her up. She had no problem doing the same in the pool. She is the most trusting child. I can ask her if she wants to float and she rolls right over and lets me do my thing. She loves the praise and really responds to in almost every situation. All in all we had a really fantastic day. I am so blessed...more than I deserve but truly, truly blessed. Thank you God for my life. Thank you for taking care of my Sophie and my Mother and for making them both whole and perfect again.

The Nelsons

Today we celebrate a couple that is very dear to my heart. So much so that I named my child after her. My Aunt Elaine and Uncle Robert are celebrating their 50th anniversary today. How does that happen? How do two people live a life with all of the trials and tribulations that a family will go through and still love each other like they do? My Aunt Elaine can tell you some of the best stories you will ever hear. I don't know how she remembers the details that she does! I have a hard time remembering what I ate for lunch from day to day yet she can tell you the most minute details of a day that happened when she and my mother were children. I started the blog in large part so I could remember the details that matter. Otherwise, it just wasn't going to happen. My Uncle Robert is something else. He used to have this reputation of just being mean. He didn't have a whole lot of patience for the kids in our family and let me tell you...if you EVER slammed the screen door, you were going to find yourself opening it and shutting it 'properly' at least 50 times in a row. If any of my siblings or cousins are reading this you have a big smile across your face and your laughing right about now. Today, he is one of the sweetest, kindest men I know. He is truly one of my favorite people and his heart is made of gold. He spends time with Landry and will get down on the floor with her and play ball with her for as long as she wants. It is one of the best sights you have ever seen. I love these people and I am so proud to call them my family. They have given their entire lives to raising their children and sometimes their grandchildren with the most generous heart and with all of their souls. I feel like I am truly home when I am at their house. I always know I have a bed, breakfast(Uncle Robert makes the best grits!), homemade pizza and there are always plenty of eyes on Landry when I'm there. Their love story proves that true and long lasting love still exists. Thank you for being such a fine example to me and to Landry and for loving your namesake the way you do. I love you both so very much and I hope you have a beautiful and blessed day.

What a gift!
Tonight I got a note from an old high school friend. Tracy blew me away with the kindness in her words and her sincerity. Thank you for giving me another reason to stay inspired and continue this blogging journey. This Facebook thing has really surprised me. I am so amazed at the people that I have reconnected with and the amount of kindness I have been given because I have shared this blog on my FB page. My inspiration comes first and foremost from Landry but I have found that it has been a great form of therapy for me. I can express myself in a way that I have never been able to before. Sometimes the naked truth comes out but it is my life and I don't have any reason to put a veil on it. I feel more freedom just by being truthful. I know that sometimes it may not be very popular but I can live with that. One of my best friends, Missie, told me that I should write a book. Lord, what would I write about and who would read it! Ha! I would have to lace it with some really funny stories or make something up! Anyone got any ideas? Thanks to everyone who has ever been generous with their hearts and words. They are a priceless gift to me and I really do cherish them. Virtual hugs to all of you!

Forever Blowing Bubbles!
Ok....I am probably going to regret posting these but these are flashback pics of me and some I took of Landry the other night. What a hoot! BTW...today I celebrate being in the US for 37 glorious years. Cheers to my parents that allowed me to be reborn and be blessed with so many opportunities. I love you!

Music to my Ears
I have always loved the music that St. Philips has blessed me with but today seemed extra special. We sang several of my favorites but one arrangement of the 23rd Psalm really touched me today. I am still trying to catch my breath from being sick last week and am still hanging on to a little cough but I (in my most sincere attempt) belted out that song like I meant it. It is my hope that Landry loves music and will have a better talent than her parents. I would love for her to play the piano and the guitar and have a voice of an angel. Her babysitter, Ashton, has the most beautiful voice and I have found her more than a few times singing to her. That makes my heart smile....big! Right now she will break out in a full dance when any thing with a beat comes on and she loves for me to sing 'Itsy Bitsy Spider to her. She will do all of the hand movements and they are always right on time. I can pretty much change her state just by busting out a little IBS to her. It's like magic. My friend Theresa bought her a Barney CD with her name in it and she recognizes her name in it when we play it. As crazy as that purple dinosaurs voice drives me, I'll gladly listen to it if it makes her happy. The funny thing is that she has never seen him because she doesn't watch TV. Well I say that but for the last few mornings she finishes up her milk and grabs my remote(while laying in my bed) and says Help! Help!---actually pronounced 'hep! hep!' She wants me to turn on the TV but never watches anything on it. She never has. As far as the HELP plea, she completely understands what that means. If she ever gets stuck doing a puzzle or trying to accomplish something and cannot do it, she never hesitates to ask me for 'HEP'. This sweet child of mine rarely ever gets frustrated because she can communicate with me so well. She is only 16 months old and has close to 300 recognizable words that she can say and understand. I don't know about you but I think that that is amazing. She is a SPONGE. She soaks up each and every day as a learning experience. Most people that spend any time with her cannot believe her vocabulary. She is also really learning peoples names and can recognize voices and faces with such ease. She knows SuSu, MoMo, PawPaw, Keeee-deee, Sha Sha, Sophie(pronounced sometimes Fo-fie) and of course the Mommy, Daddy and the most important...Bella! She certainly recognizes other people but she knows them by their voice alone. I have to tell you about Sophie. She pointed to a picture I have of her hanging on the wall one day and gave me the BABY sign and said 'baaaaby'. I told her that was a baby and what her name was. She said 'FO-fie!' I started crying. Couldn't help it....it just happened. When I told Mike, he told me that she had done the same thing with him the day before and was waiting for her to do it for me. I asked her if she wanted to give her some kisses and she held her arms up and she immediately reached over and gave her a kiss dead square on the mouth. It brings tears to my eyes just thinking about it. since then, she does it every few days and even if we are in another room and her name comes up, she runs back to my bathroom where her portrait is on my wall and screams ' FO-FIE!!' It is so funny. How will I ever explain her sister to her? I stay in a conflicted place where she is concerned these days. As much as I miss that child, I have to thank God that he chose to take her because I wouldn't have Landry. How can a Mother be almost grateful that she doesn't have her child? It hurts to think about it but it hurts even more to think about not having Landry. She is the core of who I am as a mother and I don't think I would be the mother I am if any thing in this life of mine were any different. It something I ponder from time to time and struggle with but the more I learn what being a mother is, I understand a little more what God's plan was for me. How can I question that? She is perfect and whole in His arms and he gave me something so wonderful in return. As I approach Mother's Day, I can only be filled with gratitude and thanksgiving for the many many blessings I have already received from these two beautiful children. Hug your kids, your pets, your spouse or whoever extra tight this week but make sure you hug your Mama if you still have the luxury of doing so. I know I certainly would.

Sick
I hate being sick and I really hate being a sick Mama. I used to be able to just get through it and forget about it but I have found it doesn't quite work that way when you have a little person. I hate it more for her than I do for myself because she just doesn't understand why I can't do some of the things I always do for her. I am supposed to be invincible and bulletproof. I hate to see that look of want from her for me and not be able pick her up or spend time with her. It's heart breaking. I want to always be the person she can count on for any and everything and she just didn't understand this week. I am feeling a little better but I still have a few days left to shake it. I spent the day with her today but I tried not to get too close to her(how hard was that?!). I was looking through my baby album today and I came across this picture of me. When I asked Landry who it was, she pointed to herself and said 'Laaaandry' (actually pronounced Yaaandwee!). She really does look like me but when I look at the pictures that look the most like her now at 16 months, I was 2.5 years old. When I got to the U.S., I was 17 months and weighed 14 lbs. She weighed that at 4 months! Mother always told me that I looked like a 6 month old baby that could run. I can't imagine what that looked like!
On a much happier note, Mike made Winners Circle which means a trip to Hawaii for us! I am so proud of him. It is such an accomplishment to make Winners Circle because that meant he tiered the top 11% in the country. I am looking forward to a wonderful trip and more importantly watching him get rewarded for a hard year. Congrats Sweetie!